I wrote this blog in 2013, a time when I was struggling with changing my mindset from 'cure' to 'manage'
The questions just kept coming. You already have a dog, are you nuts? Don’t you have enough going on? Things are calm right now, why add chaos and stress to your world? Those are just a few responses I got from well-intended friends and family when they heard we were getting another dog. I can’t argue with their thoughts because they all have good points, but they are also the exact reasons why we got Walter.
Walter is our 11 week old Bernese Mountain Dog. I did forget how much work it is to have a puppy. We got Cooper (our Golden Retriever) almost 10 years ago. Cooper was a lot of work, but our house was already chaotic with 4 kids under the age of 7 so my thought process was, what was one more baby/puppy in the house? Walter definitely adds another element of chaos and stress, but truth is, that is what I’m used to.
I grew up with a lot of chaos, internal (chaos we create) and external (chaos we can’t control). While there was a lot of external and tragic chaos, my mom always managed to balance it by creating good, memorable chaos. She truly believed that in the midst of uncertainty and chaos that life is good, but it was our responsibility to find it, or create it, and make it meaningful with memories, not things. Even if the good came with added stress she would say, “In 20 years you’re not going to remember the stress, but you will always have the good memories.”
My mom was right, as moms always are. Only now that we have another puppy in the house are we remembering the accidents, jumping, nipping and the shoes, furniture and rugs that were chewed up ~ all that comes with having a puppy. We have forgotten all of that because those stresses mean nothing compared to the good. Cooper has brought our family pure fun, love and joy and has helped each and every one of us through some tough times.
The past 4-1/2 years have been especially challenging for my kids, and for a few of them there have been additional circumstances that have seemed to make growing up more difficult. While it troubles me to see what they’re going through, I try to take my emotions out of it and teach them what my mom taught me ~ good things don’t just ‘happen’ to people; it is our responsibility to find them or create them! Of course the tough times never go away, and sometimes pile high on the plate, but that is actually the best time to make something good happen.
For me a good life isn’t defined by the absence of chaos because there is always the external chaos that we can’t control. And even if things seem calm at the moment, other worries like my lung cancer are still waiting in the wings. I love living in the thick of it, and doing everything I can to balance the good with the bad, and trying to create good times and special memories for my kids.
Our new puppy definitely brings more chaos, and even some stress to our lives, but he also brings fun, laughter, love and a lot of togetherness! I wake up with a smile every morning anticipating the greeting I am about to receive. In the midst of uncertainty and chaos, life is good -- and Walter makes it even better!